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[故事] 说个故事给你听:门当户对的匹配婚姻。。。

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匿名  发表于 2012-12-8 00:30:21 |阅读模式



昨天Amanda打来电话,我们好久没有联系了,大约有三年多了。自从她搬到城市的北面,她当然是不可能大早地来我们这个gym锻炼了,可是连个电话也没有,emails也不回了,健身伙伴们说起她时都摇头,无可无不可地说:“that`s it, guess Amanda disappeared, anyway, wish her all the best ...”

我却时不时会想起Amanda,也不觉得她是没心没肺的就这样把朋友们忘了,我想其实有时人在生活的某个阶段或许会期望自己去面对自己,不受他人的干扰,理出一些头绪来的,我想她或许需要这么一段时间 ... Amanda是个祖籍希腊的女子,黑黑的眼睛黑黑的头发,古铜色的皮肤好健康的漂亮,凹凸有致的身材连女人都觉得她性感 ... 健身伙伴里的女友们有喜欢她的,也有不喜欢的。喜欢她的人喜欢她那抹也抹不掉的率性,不喜欢她的人不喜欢她那挥也挥不去的傲气 ...

电话里Amanda兴奋地告诉我她要结婚了。我恭喜她,然后问,“marry who?” 她在电话那头笑出了声,“a man,of course, silly ?

于是,我们又回到三年前的亲密 ...

Amanda无疑是聪明的,四五年前,年仅二十七八岁的她已经有着工商管理和法律两个学位了,当时她刚毕业,在市政府做犯罪陪审律师(criminal jury lawyer),很辛苦的一份工作,她告诉我说是精神上辛苦,因为得同形形色色的罪犯们打交道,看到人性里好多的丑恶肮脏和无奈 ... Amanda是独生女,父母在东岸,她小时候父母就离异了,她跟着母亲和母亲的前前后后几任男友长大,然后到中部贷着款读完大学和研究院,打着工供养自己毕业后做了律师 ... 她与父母并不亲近,于是难免的孤单,于是男朋友交了一个又一个 ...

记得有一次我问她交这么多男友是不是会感觉麻木,她突然很认真地对我说: “I don`t love any of them, I`m just lonely ... I loved one guy when I was in college, we lived together for almost two years, but that time I didn`t want to marry him, I left him ... ”

我诧异地看着Amanda,心想,这么随心随性的Amanda难道也如此深的爱过? 熬不住的好奇心,我还是问了她: “who was that guy? If you were so in love, why didn`t you want to marry him?” ...

Amanda看着我,神情在一瞬间变的有些低迷,她说: “well, I met him in my sophomore year, he was a young chef, cute, nice and romantic ... later on all my girlfriends were dating lawyers, doctors ... wanted to marry men with great future, or, established men ... I felt that he didn`t have much ambition, he was too laid-back, too simple ... I couldn`t see future with him, so I left him ... but I still love him, just can`t forget him ... ”

我哑然了,心想,能让这么聪明出众的Amanda陷入爱河并念念不忘的男人,应该是幸运的,可是爱情总归只是爱情,婚姻大约是更现实的吧? ...

“well, Amanda, I know you`re marrying a man now, what else you want to tell me?” ... 我回到主题,玩笑着问。

“remember? I told you about him before, the chef...” Amanda好象是在等着我问她,她快乐地告诉我,“don`t be surprised, and don`t tell me that I was out of my mind ... all these years I have dated different men, the rich, the handsome, the smart ... but he, he is the one has the best heart ... and he loves me just for me ... he`s not superficial, he`s not controlling, he`s not self-centered ... that is enough ... and of course, you know we have the best chemistry ... ”

哈哈,我笑了,还有什么可以问的呢,其实爱情总归是爱情,而怎样定义“门当户对的匹配”婚姻其实是因人而异的,有人认为“门当户对的匹配”是建立在事业和金钱上的;有人认为“门当户对的匹配”是体现在长相容貌上的;而有人如Amanda最终悟出的那样,认为“门当户对的匹配”是一种灵魂与肉体的相吸相爱 ...

Amanda
婚姻路刚刚开始,一如所有的婚姻,前面不会只是鲜花和浪漫,祝福她在这一刻是用心去爱的,是相爱而嫁的 ... 而再其实无论是怎样的婚姻,想要风风雨雨白头携老,都必须用心去work it out,work it out ...






 
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